The Quiz Show Pony

I had a pony when I was a young boy of ten.  Got it in a funny way.  One day the telephone rang, and I answered it.  A voice that was a little familiar told me that I could win a pony by answering a few questions.  It was a quiz show calling, and I was the lucky person who could be the owner of a beautiful pony.  So I answered some questions that I couldn't recall thirty minutes later.  And hung up the phone so excited, planning where I would house my pony and what I would name it and how was I going to tell my parents that soon they'd have another mouth to feed.  I let the question of another mouth to feed leave my mind entirely and just dwelt on the positive side of having a pony.

When I told my parents what had occurred, they just looked at each other, shaking their heads.  From their attitude, it was evident they thought someone was playing a joke on me.

Well, someone was playing a joke on me.  It was my uncles, who loved to tell me jokes and play tricks on me.  It was weeks before my two aunts found out about  the latest trick played on me.  When they did, they immediately demanded that the uncles buy me a pony and deliver it.

Several weeks later, a truck pulled into the yard, and out came a beautiful pony, black with a little blaze of white on her forehead.  I loved that pony immediately and named her Sugar.  In a couple of weeks, we realized Sugar was pregnant.  So we wound up with two ponies  for one joke.  The foal I gave to my little brother.

For several years, we loved and cared for the two ponies.  Gradually we outgrew the little ones and wanted horses.  So Dad bought us a big horse, sight unseen  from an ad in the paper.  Little did we know what havoc that horse would bring.

For one thing, no one could ride it.  I couldn't, my brother couldn't, our friends couldn't.  Finally Dad decided he would show us how it was done.  He saddled that wild thing, lead it to the pasture and started trying to mount it.  The horse would shy away, and slip just out of reach, making Dad madder and madder.  Then he just jumped on the saddle, put his feet in the stirrups, and hung on for dear life as the horse bucked and dipped and became air borne.  Then it was Dad who became air borne, flying high in the air and coming down flat on his back, making a loud "whump" noise.

All of us spectators were laughing so hard at the antics of the horse and Dad trying to ride him, that we continued to laugh as he lay on the ground.  At the same time, we all realized Dad hadn't moved, our laughter quickly ended and we rushed to where he was.  He couldn't move, couldn't breathe, but his eyes were open, and we realized he was mad.  I mean, really mad.  After he got his breathe back, he gave us what for because of our laughter.  We were sorry we had laughed.  But it was such a comical moment, we still laugh when we think about it.

As soon as Dad got to the phone, he called the newspaper and put an ad in it.  In two or three days, he started getting calls from interested people.  Several people came by to see the horse, wanting to know all the particulars.  So they got the truth from Dad.  Wild and untamed, he said, difficult.

A man from the Florida panhandle came by the second time, saying he wanted the horse for his grandchildren.  Dad told him he'd think twice about letting the grandchildren try to ride him.  But the man was insistent, saying he had a lot of experience with horses, and he could handle this one.  So he came by one day with his horse trailer, and we helped him load the horse, all the while the horse was kicking and prancing and jumping around.

We stood around talking for a while, and the horse could be heard bumping the walls of the wooden trailer, and making all sorts of noises in there.  Then the new owner cranked up that big diesel truck and took off slowly for Florida.  Well, he made it about fifty yards before pieces of the wooden trailer started flying off.  That horse was kicking so hard that the trailer was shaking and rocking.  The man stopped the truck, got out of it and walked around to the back of the trailer.  By that time, half the trailer was gone.  He managed to get a loop around the horse's neck and tied the head down.  Then he managed to get a rope on some legs and tie them down.  How he did it, I'll never know.

Dad tried to help but he was just in the way.  When the horse was completely tied down, Dad told the man he wouldn't hold him to the deal if he wanted to back out.  The man just looked at Dad, a stern look on his face.  Don't worry, he said, I'll tame this horse;  he'll know who's boss before long.

Later, we got a phone call from the man.  His tone had definitely changed.  He told Dad that the horse managed to break loose from him as soon as he unloaded him, and he hadn't seen him since.  No one had seen him, he figured that horse was living in the wilds of northwest Florida.

We just hoped he didn't know how to get back to our house.